Bob & the Branflakes massacre-a story i wrote for my LIT 2 class

BE WARNED THE STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ IS GRAPHIC AND MAY NOT BE APPROPRIATE FOR SOME READERS

In 1943, a crazy scientist named Bob, who is also a retired Marine Corps

sniper, had just completed a prototype time machine. He was about to eat

some branflakes when the machine malfunctioned sending him 200 years

into the future. Bob tries to get the machine to work but is no use as it had

over-heated and fried the circuits.

The year is now 2143, Bob is still hungry for bran flakes so he

decides to go to the store and get some. He walks to the store near where

his house was in 1943 and asked the cashier where the bran flakes were and

he replied "haven't you heard?...there is a shortage of bran flakes and milk"

something inside Bob snapped, he pulled out his Colt M1911, pointed it at

the youngman's face, and pulled the trigger. Blood and brain matter

sprayed all over Bob's face as the bullet entered through the cashiers eye

socket and exploded out the back of his skull, imbedding into the wall

behind him.His lifeless body crumbles to the floor in a pool of blood

spilling out the golf ball sized hole in the back of his skull. Bob grabs a

napkin off the counter and wipes the blood and brain matter from his face

as he heads for another store.


Bob got to the second store and they toldhim that they had milk but

no branflakes. This made Bob even angrier so he walked up to the cashier

of that store, and shot him point blank in the neck severing both his jugular

and corroded. Blood sprays out his neck like a high pressure fire hose

covering Bob and the floor in his blood, he clasps his neck in an attempt to

stop the bleeding but it is no use as he starts choking on his own

blood, and dies. Just as Bob starts walking towards the door the bag girl (a

female alien) comes out of the bathroom (where she had been smoking a

blunt and listening to death metal so she did not hear the shots), sees Bob

covered head to toe in blood, and screams for help. Bob stops, turns

around, and shouts "shut the fuck up you stupid cunt" as he shoots her

three times in the Larynx (aka voice box), ripping her neck to shreds and

Shutting her up for good. On the way out Bob spits in her face and mutters "if you had just kept your god damn legs closed and mouth shut this wouldn t have happened..." then heads for another store.



Bob enters the last store in town trying to find bran flakes and milk.

He sees that a lady with a demon baby in her cart has just bought the last

box of branflakes and the last gallon of milk. This in-rages Bob Even more,

he walks up to the lady, pulls out his Colt M1911, and empties its 8, .45

caliber round clip( including one in the chamber, F.Y.I 7+1=8 ) into her.



The first two are sent ripping through herleft lung and bouncing around

her chest cavity. The third, fourth, and fifth are sent tearing through her

liver,stomach, and spleen then exploding out her back shattering the shop

window behind her. Blood is sent gushing out the three new quarter sized

holes in her upper back filling the air with the sweet, warm smell of fresh

blood splattering all over the floor, her cart and her baby. The baby lets out

a high pitched evil laugh as the warm blood splashes onto its face. The sixth

hits her in the shoulder and shatters both her scapula and clavicle (two

bones in the shoulder). The seventh and eighth cut through her heart like a

hot knife through butter as it beats one final time and is expelled out her

back covering the wall and the shattered window behind with her blood.

The demon baby laughs as its mothers bloody, bullet ridden body collapses

to the floor and the last shred of life fades from her eyes and she dies in a

pool of her own blood. Bob reaches into the cart and picks up the baby who

is still laughing and snaps its neck. Bob laughs as he scoops out its eye balls

and eats them. He licks his lips as he rips the baby in half and eats em.

When he is done eating the baby he realizes that he does not want bran

flakes anymore, He wants some pimps and O's he grabs a box off the shelf

but before he can eat them a cop bursts through the door at the front of the

store and fires three shots at him. The first one hits the box of Pimps and

O's out of Bob's hand. The other two shots hit the shelf of can goods behind

him. Bob then returns fire hitting the cop in the chest three times. The

resulting force of the three .45 caliber rounds impacting his Kevlar vest

knocks himto the ground and breaks four ribs. The officer crawls behind a

small desk,pulls out his radio and reports a code 10-10 (shots fired) and

10-13(officer down). Bob comes up behind, the officer mutters "oh shit"

as Bob shoots him in the forehead. He then walks over to him,takes the

officer's glock, drops his pants, and shits in his mouth. Bob then walks out of the store and sees a hover bus full of retard

alien children. He shoots the driver in the head splattering blood and brain all

over the windshield. The bus swerves and crashes into an elementary

school for mentally handicapped aliens, and blows up. killing all 25 kids on

the bus and more than 300 kids and staff in the school. You can hear a

popping sound made by the burning bodies of dead retards.

Bob walks to where his house was in 1943 and sees that a family of

aliens is now living there. Bob walks up to the door and picks the lock. He

then walks to the master bedroom and sees that the two parents are still

sound asleep. He walks up to the left side of the bed w here the father is

sleeping,takes out his K-bar and stabs him in the heart. Blood soaks the

sheets andthe bed below. Bob moves over to the right side of the bed where

the motheris sleeping, grabs her head, and pulls her chin down to her chest

(allowing for maximum damage and blood loss), she wakes up just in time

to watch Bob slit her throat ear to ear. He can see the fear in her eyes as she

bleeds out,and it makes him smile. Bob then walks into the kid's room and

plunges his knife into the base of her skull severing her spinal cord, killing

her instantaneously. Bob cuts out her eyeballs and gobbles them up. He

then lifts the lifeless alien's body and swallows her whole.

Bob licks the blood from his lips then walks out and into the living

room, where he hears the news on the TV. They are talking about all the

murders Bob had committed. They then showed a video of bob shooting the

officer and then shitting in his mouth. The news caster says that Bob is

considered armed and extremely dangerous and that anyone with info

about his whereabouts should call the snitch hotline at

666-46-3825-9687-7353 (aka 666-go-fuck-your-self). They also state that

the deathtoll is now over 325 people Bob tums off tne TV locks the door

behind him,and heads for the police station.

When Bob gets to the police station he sees a CNN news van

parked out front, a news caster is doing a segment on live TV talking about

how Bob is an insane individual and should turn himself in before he is

kMed,Bobwalks up to the news caster and yells "Go fuck yourself you

stupid motherfucking liberals" as he shoots the news anchor in the head (with the officers glock), coating the camera lens in blood. The camera falls

to theground as Bob kills the camera man. Bob proceeds to piss on the

newscasters body, then cuts off his head, and throws it through the poli

station window. Ten officers come out shooting at Bob, he gets off 6 rounds

(killing 2 of the officers and wounding another) before he is hit by a round

in the leg,then another in the chest, then 2 more in the head. The officers

surround Bob as he falls to the ground splashing into a pool of his own

blood.

The End?

Imagine a man raping a baby. His penis would shift it's guts around as fractured bones cut into it. Or putting a baby in a toilet and unleashing explosive diarrhea upon it. Or furry porn. Now imagine all three at once.

e621.net

Raping babys??? Wtf??

It's better than eating them. Don't know how unhealthy baby meat is?

No eating babies is very healthy loo look it up

Eating babies can cause you to forget punctuation and stutter when you say "look".

Lol you caught me i eat babies for every meal

I give it two thumbs up. Good job.

Lol thanks